Monday, November 24, 2008

women of faith weekend

I am back from my weekend get away. I had a wonderful time!!! I really needed it. I expected God to speak and He did, but in several areas so I am still processing and listening for more. I got to eat at In and Out and had to call my cousin Jim and tell him because he doesn't get that where he lives and really misses it. All the ladies that went had a good time and I believe we all got something from it. I laughed, cryed, danced ( I am a good Baptist), praised, listened, ate and so much more. God is so good! His grace is truly amazing and something I loose focus of way too easily. I complain, whine and my attitude stinks. You think I would stay focused more, but I let busyness, laziness, and selfishness get in the way too often. I need to worship God and not worry about what others think. They may look at me and think I am crazy, singing , dancing and talking with my Lord but so what. It is what I was made to do!!!!
We are going to California for Thanksgiving and I have lots to still take care of. I hope everyone is truly thankful. I know I have an abundance to be thankful for. Enjoy and stay focused on Christ.

Friday, November 21, 2008

weekend away

Today I am leaving for the Women of Faith that will be in Phx. I can't wait. Just to get away will be nice. There are 9 going from my church and we leave in just a few hours. I love my family but I know most of you can appreciate that I need a little time away every once in a while. I am a stay at home mom and rarely have time for just me. Paul doesn't usually understand this need. He gets put everyday, although it isn't for pleasure. I am also a lot more social than he is. In his defense he may not "agree" that I "NEED" this time away, but he still lets me get away, even though it makes no sense to him. I am praying for a renewing, and direction from God, not just entertainment. I can't wait to hear from my Lord and really worship Him. I am blessed. Got lots to do so I am signing off. Catch you later! Pray for me

Monday, November 17, 2008

moving mountains

God has once again been speaking to me. Something I am both grateful for and amazed by, even if it isn't always easy to take. Most of us, including myself only pray half heartedly unless we are in soooo deep we are beyond desperate. American churches ( there are exceptions) have settled for mediocrity and shout hallaluiah about it. We don't see God at work because we have taken HIM for granted so long it is all we know. Our pastor talked on this yesterday and I really was convicted. I pray when I am nodding off in bed, I praise God lukewarmly ( and we all know what God does with that...Puke!) How often do I fall to my knees...literally and worship or cry ABBA FATHER? God loves me and wants a realationship with me. He loves to hear me worship Him and cry out to Him. He will move mountains, He is the God of miracles STILL. God doesn't need me to defend Him, He is a big God and He can handle it. If I pray and the answer is no I don't need to "explain" to anyone. God can do what He wants to when He wants to.
God has been speaking to me for years about something He wants for me and I keep putting it off and making excuses as to why I am not doing it. Well no more! God will provide and equip for what He calls. I am trusting and believing in the God of creation, my Lord and Savior!!! I am not a "name it and claim it"person. I don't expect perfect health, or great amounts of money, but My GOD will provide all my NEEDS!!!!!
Pray and expect to hear from your Savior!

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Today I am going to spend the day cleaning(yipee). Our interim pastor is coming for lunch tomorrow. He is truly a gift from God. I love his heart for God and our church. He loves the little kids all the way up to the grouchy set in there ways club. He helps us focus on what we as individuals need to be doing and not condeming on judging. He is so in love with his Savior it is obvious. He is a true blessing and I am glad for the time I have to spend with him. God is teaching me a lot through him.
As a side note I have a dye stress test scheduled for Dec. 1 and 2nd. This is just precautionary because of my family history. So far everthing looks good. I will keep you posted, and thanks for the prayers

Thursday, November 13, 2008

cardiologist

Today I went to the cardiologist, yippe!! I had a couple of ekg's done and a stress test. I am having another stress test with dye in my heart next but I am not sure when. I get to see the Dr. every 6 months. I was the youngest one in there by at least 15 to 20 years. Even the nurses were asking why I was being seen. Well for those of you who don't know let me tell you, heart problems run in my family like wild fire. Dad was 52 and Carrie was 44 when they passed away from heart attacksm and they had had them before then as well. I was also having symptoms last week so I decided better safe than sorry. Our family has been through enough for now and Bobbie (my sister I treasure!!!!) ( she hates that) and mom are glad I went and I am getting everything checked. I know I have really high cholesterol and the dr. said I should consider exercising (yuck) can't afford a gym and no one at home wants to do it with me. Although it would be good for Jennifer too. This is not fun with the holidays coming. I do not need my family "helping" me when I go to California for Thanksgiving. I want to enjoy my stuffing and pumpkin pie! I can eat healthy as a new year resolution....I promise ;0

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

we're back

Well we are back from our visit with friends in Sierra Vista. We had a great time catching up. This is where Jennifer and Levi were both born, so I always love going. It is a great size town, not too big or small. The weather was a little cool which of course I loved. I enjoyed Sunday worship. I have always gotten something out of Mark's sermons, and this time was no exception.
If I want to really be head over heals in love with my Savior I need to spend time with Him and act like I am in love. Nothing else will completly satisfy me. That doesn't mean my life will be perfect and trouble free! I think that is something we tend to forget, especially here in America. We feel we are owed something, or if we could just get a little more we would be ok...WRONG
This world is full of sin and hurting, broken, imperfect people, even christians. We need to remember that and keep our focus on Christ. We need to show the world that even with hurts and trials we still have a reason to sing and praise God. The world is desperately looking for answers. are we showing them what it can be like to fall in love we Jesus?

Thursday, November 6, 2008

my sister




Monday was November 3rd. My sister Carrie would have been 45 years old. I was going to write then but I was in the emergency room all day with a uti, dehydration and symptoms of a heart attack (that is another story). I also realize I probably would not have felt like writing then any way. It was exactly 5 months since she was found dead in her apartment. Sometimes it feels so long ago and other times it seems like I was just talking to her.


For those of you who didn't have the priviledge to know her I want to share a little. This may not matter to you but it does me a load of good! She was not perfect, she could be very grouchy, nasty, and even down right mean, but I usually needed to hear what she had to say. She loved tea and tea parties, she loved earrings, and not just normal ones either. The bigger the better and if they were unique that was the best. She loved to write and dreamed of being a published author one day. I have several of her writings on a disk. She had the best memory in the family. We are all in trouble now because none of us remember anything without her. She LOVED her cute kids (Calvin, Jennifer, Levi, and Nathaniel) !! All of her friends knew their stories because she was so proud of them all. She was a great massage therapist, blind, and a great listener. She was the best at praying with me. She had 3 tattoos and her hair style and color would change often. She was a belly dancer that I never had the pleasure of seeing perform, I was always to far away. She loved her Savior passionatly!!! Most of you have already heard this but I needed to do this. Our family is still having a hard time and normal will never be the same. My kids still have her phone number memorized and I can't delete it from my phone.


Thanks for letting me share. My next entry should be more uplifting!