Wednesday, December 9, 2009

It's that time of year

I love the Fall, even though we don't get much in the way of a real season here in Arizona. This is the time of year when I get to spend time with family and reflect on this past year and all that has happened, good and bad. I try and keep Thanksgiving separate from Christmas, something that I am afraid is a loosing battle in this family. The weather is finally cool enough for even me to enjoy. I try and get our children to be thankful and remember what Christmas is all about. I need this reminder as much as they do...maybe even more. I love all the lights, songs, decorations, baking, parties, etc. It is easy to get lost in all the activity that goes on here. I wonder if I would love it as much if I didn't have a tree, stockings, sugar cookies, and Bing Crosby? I would like to say YES! I am not sure though. I do know that I would love to spend as much time with my family as a possibly can. I still miss Callahan, and my sister so much it is a physical ache, especially this time of year. We went to Levi's school Christmas show last night. It was just what you would expect from school children, with all the songs and dancing around. I loved every minute of it. I remember being in them when I was in school. I am so blessed to have a family of my own now that I can do the same things that my parents did. I never thought it would really happen for me. I consider my family my Christmas miracle. Carrie would have sat right there with me and cried the whole time. I wonder what Mary and Joseph felt when Jesus and His siblings sang and danced together. I guess I can be thankful for Christmas even before Thanksgiving and hopefully all year long. Without my Savior I would have no reason to be thankful for all those I miss and I know I will see again. It is that time of year but I pray that we teach our children and others what really matters. When you take away all the lights, and cookies, God came to Earth for me and that should make me sing all year long.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Living the life?

Went to Mom and Bobbie's for the weekend. Had a good visit with several cousins, my Aunt and a couple of friends. It had been a while since we had been down and it was great to get away. One of Carrie's closest friends came down Saturday and brought Folio. For those of you who don't know, he was Carrie's guide dog for around 10 years. He was the one with her until the end. He is now almost 14 and would have been retired from guide work. He is deaf, going blind, has arthritis, and fat, fat, fat. He loves it. As soon as he pulled up to Mom's he knew where he was and got very excited. It was great to see him but also sad. I have never seen him without my sister. He is happy , very happy. Kellie and her husband have other dogs and cats and they all go for walks every evening around the park. He is loved on and cared for. I think he is good for Kellie too. She and Carrie were very close and caring for Folio helps. We stay in touch and that is great for all of us. I was worried about Folio when Carrie died. He went to another friends for a long time but wasn't happy there at all. I don't think Kellie was happy either. Now both are together and living a life they both love. We all need someone to love us unconditionally, take care of our needs and know we are special. Folio found that and he is thriving ( as much as a 14 year old dog can). I have found it in my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, but I tend to forget. Maybe I am deaf and blind all too often to my blessing He pours out for me. I need to only focus on Him. Folio knows he is safe with Kellie around, if he can't see it or hear it she can, she will even carry him when he needs it, like up the stairs at my mom's house. I need to do that. Trust my Savior to hear and see what I can't and just stay close to Him, then I too will be living the life. Even if I am deaf and blind, my Jesus isn't. My life isn't perfect but I can be content, Folio is and his life hasn't been perfect either. I know he is a dog, but it was a great reminder for me.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Forgiven much or little?

I have been doing a Beth Moore study Jesus the One and Only. I have done this study 2 other times and wasn't going to do it this time. I knew the workbook answers, and even if I did it again I wasn't getting a new book. My thought was just use the old one. Well A wise leader gave me a new book anyway. She knew I would get lazy and not really participate. I know God's Word is alive and always speaking to me but I continue to be amazed at the things I am learning that I know I must have heard before.
Last week week we were in Luke 7:36-50. I have read this "story" many times, I have heard sermons and songs about it. A wonderful story but I wasn't expecting to get a big aha moment out of it. I was wrong.
First, I need to remember this wasn't just a story. We tend to forget that when we read the Bible. This woman was real and so was Simon, they lived and are related to someone today, maybe even me. Second, this woman was a "sinner". That is what Simon thought to himself. Aren't we all sinners? Simon was horrified that she was there weeping and kissing Jesus' feet. Why were her sins so much more terrible than Simon's? Simon was a Pharisee, he was religious, so much better than most, according to him anyway.
Christ told Simon something that clicked in a new and real way to me. Jesus said " her sins, which are many, have been forgiven, for she loved much, but he who is forgiven little, loves little" (vs. 47) Our churches are full of people who love little. We may not mean to be that way or even realize that is what we are. We grow up in church, accept Christ at age 8 or 9 and go on with life. We don't know how to love much. We were never a "sinner" like some of the people out there and if we were we don't tell anyone at church because we will be condemned. We say we love but it is hard for us. We want our churches to look nice. Christ's followers were not church going Bible thumping choir singing followers. Our churches are failing at loving. We tell ourselves that we are no better and sin is sin but our attitude screams differently. We need to learn to love much. Thank God if you don't have a horrible sin secret or not so secret but don't become a Pharisee and memorize a bunch of rules, and wait for someone to break them so you can point fingers and gossip(which is a huge sin) I would take an adulterer over a gossip in church. Gossip doesn't have to be a lie to be gossip and Satan uses it in our churches like wildfire( sorry that should be another blog). Our churches are hurting because we have forgotten how to love like Christ. We are all sinners and if your sins are not as dirty as someone else's get on your knees and weep gratitude before a Holy God that He protected you! Anyone can be like "that" woman at Jesus' feet. I am, and can't wait to weep and kiss His feet. Lord help me to love much!

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Tripped in the Mud

Last week Jennifer's school called. I wasn't home so we all played telephone tag. Paul finally called me (Nathaniel and I were at a friends house for a play date) and informed me that Jennifer needed a change of clothes because she had fallen in the mud. I was not happy because I was inconvenienced by all of this. She had done this before, she has terrible balance. My friend actually had some clothes she was getting rid of ( one of the reasons for my visit) and they would fit Jennifer, even shoes. I left Nathaniel to play and I quickly drove to the school, to rescue my princess. Jennifer was waiting in the Nurses office, her shoes were outside the door covered in mud. Her pants were bad but her shirt was only a little splattered. She changed clothes, seemed very happy and went to computer lab where the rest of her class was. I took her muddy stuff with me.
When Paul brought Jennifer home from school for the day, he asks me if I know that Jennifer was pushed into the mud? Well this was definitely news to me. Jennifer didn't mention it, the nurse didn't mention it, no one told me anything. I assumed she had fallen. What had happened, and why were we not told? We sat Jennifer down and asked for her to tell us all about what had happened during recess. She said she was not pushed but she was tripped, "by who," we asked. She had no idea who it was. She did tell both of her teachers. She said whoever did it got a pink slip. This is a bad thing that most kids try and avoid all year long. When you get a pink slip you get a visit with the guidance counselor, the principle or both.
Even though I was furious for not being properly informed, I was amazed and impressed with the way Jennifer handled it. She was not in tears when I got to her, even though she was covered in mud. She had let the proper authorities know what had happened. She told us what had happened as best as she could with what she saw and knew. She didn't blame anyone, if she wasn't sure who it was. She was OK with the whole thing.
Oh to be more like my precious daughter. When life knocks me down why don't I take it to my Savior? Why don't I tell Him what happened and let Him take care of it? Why do I want to get even and mean, complain and scream "it isn't fair"? I don't see the whole picture either and yet I am so sure that it is terribly unfair how I am treated. Satan is going to try and trip me, sometimes he will succeed. I need to take it to Jesus and let Him handle it. Get cleaned up and go on with what God has for me to do.
By the way she got a written apology the next day from the boy. God took care of her better than I could have. I would have hurt the kid, but that is another story.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Jelousy and envy

I woke up this morning in a really good mood. I have been doing an in depth Bible study and have really been praying and seeking after God. Life is on track and I am excited about what God is going to do in my life and in Paul's.
Then I checked e-mail. I received 2 different updates from friends who are as opposite as possible. One is in California and is a working professional and the other is in Florida family who literally live by faith in all they do. They both sent updates on what all is happening in their lives. This doesn't happen often either, my friend in Ca. does it maybe once a year at best. Both updates were exciting and full of the things God is doing. He is moving in mighty ways on both coasts and it is wonderful to see my friends being a part of all He is doing.
Satan is alive and well. When I read both updates, I immediately got upset. My good mood vanished and I pouted. Why are they all being used and not me? I am ready, I have been waiting for a very long time. I am seeking. It isn't fair that amazing things are going on with them and I sit in a basement in Safford Arizona checking off the days. I love these friends and yet I find myself asking "why them and not me, are they so much better than I am?" I shouldn't be surprised at these feelings. Satan doesn't like it when we are praising God and in His Will. I know I am getting there. I stopped and started praying Scripture. I know God has plans for Goldie O'Dell and they are wonderful. I know I am fearfully and wonderfully made, I know He loves me beyond anything I can comprehend. I was letting Satan bring me down. My friends are hearing from God and doing what He has called them to do. I can not do what they are doing ( one signs at worship conferences). I almost let my day be ruined be my focus slipping down and not staying up. I will be honest, it still hurts a little and I am frustrated to sit and wait. I feel I have waited a long time and learned a lot, but apparently I am not ready to move on. So I wait and praise, and wait and praise. God owes me nothing and only He knows what and when He wants me to be used by Him.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

WARNING...menopause is the topic

Well let me just say that I was not prepared for what I thought would be menopause. I saw the musical after all, what more did I need, the soundtrack? My mom had no problems, just stopped around age 41...poof, so not fair.
I started having perimenopause symptoms almost 10 years ago. No doctors would take it seriously. I was told all the time "I was too young". They didn't listen to my symptoms, hear my family history ( mom was very young) or would even run tests. They didn't see a reason. While my cycles and symptoms started really going crazy so was I. Finally six months ago I had my doctor do blood work ( just to humor me). When I went back in he was shocked, my tests confirmed what I already knew. He just kept saying "but you are so young" I should be grateful that he thinks I am too young. I also was not aware of just how many symptoms there really are. I knew about hot flashes, I have had them for a few years now. I know about the messed up cycles that will not let you leave your house at times, ( a lot of times you can't even leave the bathroom). I have heard a little about the depression. I thought I was just going through so much in the last couple of years that that was the reason for being a little down in the dumps. I don't sleep well at night, and I don't want to get up in the morning. I have no energy and then I feel guilty for not getting things done. I didn't know that my memory would be sooooo terrible. I can't remember anything and feel stupid. At least I know I am married, have 3 kids and where I live. My favorite symptom is the menopause acne. I never had acne in school. God was kind to me. Now it looks like I took a brillo pad to my forehead. I don't know what to do and my pride is totally embarrassed about it. Makeup only works a little. I feel much sorrier for teens with this problem than I ever thought I would. The last issue I have I was so not expecting. My family is complete. Paul and I agreed about that after Nathaniel was born. Paul had it taken care of for us and I was OK with it. Now that I know I am done ovulating, (I don't miss the bleeding at all, although I still have the cramps at times,) the idea that I am finished is more depressing than I ever thought it would be. I can cry just thinking about not being pregnant ever again. Seeing a new born really can set me off. I think it is just the idea of being too old and I hate it. Paul thinks I am crazy of course, and maybe I am. I hope these symptoms go away soon. I don't want to be like Sarah and Abraham...but a baby?
I need prozac and prayer!

I'm back!!!!

Well, Summer is way over, the computer crashed, and life has been crazy. I am now up and running (make that walking) on our old computer. The summer came and went and I am not sure where or how. Levi did learn to swim and even earned his cub scout, belt loop and pin for it. I reconnected with some old friends through facebook and got to spend a couple of days with some of them in Phoenix, and some of them in Tucson. Paul is still having back problems and I think it may never change. It is hard and it affects all of us. Jennifer is defiantly a preteen with mood swings and attitude, She is hungry and stealing food more and it hurts and frustrates me. Levi is at a charter school this year and only goes 4 days a week. I don't think he likes it any better but he loves the 3 day weekends. Nathaniel is still into everything and tires me out just watching him and saying no. He would love to be in school but isn't ready to sit still and pay attention. He needs an old T. V. to take apart and play with. I am still seeking God and waiting on Him. I am not good at this and I am tired of being in my mother-in-laws basement and living in a Mormon community. I hope to keep up again, because this is much needed therapy for me.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Mother's Day...three perspectives

When I was a little girl, I loved Mother's Day. I loved trying to make breakfast, and plaster hand prints for my Mom. Dad was fun to watch too. He always wanted to surprise Mom with fun gifts that would make her feel special. I knew I had the best mom you could ask for. Anything we made she said she loved, no matter what it was, even if she couldn't tell what it was suppose to be. She was happy with a peanut butter sandwich too. When I got older, I often wondered if she really loved all the homemade gifts and cards as much as she claimed. Then I had children....
When I became a mom for the first time it was Mother's Day weekend. I went home from the hospital without my daughter, and my mom was with me. I was thrilled and hurting the first time I got to celebrate on the mommy side of this holiday. I now have three kids and I know I am blessed beyond belief to be able to celebrate Mother's Day. I now look forward to the plaster hand prints, bookmarks made in scouts, and cards that I can't always read. I understand my Mom more now and appreciate her more than I thought I ever would seeing Mother's Day from the other side. I know my mom really did love all those gifts, flowers and cards. I can't imagine spending Mother's Day without my children.....
This is my Mom's first Mother's Day without my sister. I can't fathom what she may be feeling. Bobbie will try and make it as perfect as possible (she is like Dad) Bobbie will want to make a wonderful lunch, find the most amazing gifts and find the most beautiful flowers. She will stress over it. I am not there, and maybe I should be. I do know no matter what we do my Mom is going to hurt, it is inevitable. I can't make the pain go away or pretend it isn't there. I don't have the answers. I am praying, and praying and praying. I have learned how my mom feels a lot by how I feel about my own children. I hope I never have to out live my kids, but if I do I will have a much better idea of what my Mom is feeling. I wish I had made a plaster hand for my Mom this year...I think it might have been the perfect gift! I love you Mom.

Friday, May 8, 2009

Jennifer


Well Monday was Nathaniel's birthday now today is Jennifer's. She is 11 today. She is all girl...moods and all. She is already acting like a teenager. She is having a girly party with NO boys ( ie her brothers) they can give her presents after the party at home. She can start crying for no apparent reason...at least as far as daddy and her brothers can see. She is very emotional and still loves pink more than ever. She and 3 friends are getting their nails done today. She will then come home and watch High School Musical. If she is like this now what will she be like when she is 15? Do I want to know? NO, I try and take each day as it comes. I look forward to enjoying the days ahead. Sometimes I still get glimpses of my little girl (she still loves to color, just like her mom). Sometimes I get overwhelmed at wondering what the future holds for her and us.Will she ever be independent, will she get married, will she alway be hungry, etc. I try and lay it all at God's feet and LEAVE it there. She is a joy and she drives me crazy. I am going to write a childrens book called The Cranky Princess (Princess Ju Ju). I am going to dedicate it to Jennifer and my sister Carrie. I think is might be a good reminder for me as well. I am a princess to the King of Kings and I can get very cranky. I wonder what God thinks? Am I a joy and do I drive Him crazy? I see so many parallells in our lives. God uses Jennifer and the boys to show me so much. I love being a mom I just need reminding sometimes...Praise God, He doesn't need reminding that He loves me, even when I am cranky....See you after the nail party :D

Monday, May 4, 2009





Nathaniel


Four year ago today. I went to the Dr. for a check up. It was Wednesday and and Paul was graduating with a masters at Southwestern(with honors!!!) after 4 long years. I was going to watch him graduate!! I may not have taken the tests or written the papers but I was with him in ministry 100%. I had lived on little money and no spending (something I was not good at but was learning),I prayed on my knees for him and us,I had taken classes and was learning a lot too, I was an officer for the wives club on campus. I was with him all the way and proud!!! I was excited this Wednesday, everything was going great. I had a maternity dress that was given to me new for the graduation. My pregnancy was going great...better than the last two. Then I have my blood pressure checked and it is high...way high!!! They have me lay on my left side...no good, still high :( They then tell me I am not leaving. As a matter of fact they tell me to call Paul (we only had the one vehicle) and tell him he better meet me at the hospital next door, with my bag(not packed).I hadn't eaten all day and now I wasn't allowed to. I was not happy or nice about that. I had a c-section at 6:00 p.m. (still hungry). Nathaniel and I didn't get home until Sat. evening...after graduation and Jennifer's birthday party. I was bummed but I couldn't complain, I had NATHANIEL!!!!!
Now today he turns 4 years old. He is always running and full of energy. He has a great vocabulary and wants to be just like his big brother. He is getting a bike today so he can ride like Levi. He wants to know everything and he wants to know now! He tells me that he loves me ( something I never get tired of hearing) and when ever I am sad he asks if I am missing Aunt Carrie, or Ms.Dana. He is wise beyond his years and I love it when he bugs his brother and sister...I remember those days myself. He loves to do it himself...most of the time, and loves being a big kid, but not too big ( his words not mine) He likes staying home and playing or the park. He want me to get little so I can play more with him. He is a delight, and exhausting. I thank God for him. I didn't think I would have a third (we tried for 2 and half years) God is good!! I often tell my children I know God loves me, and the reason I know is because He gave me 3 kids...I am blessed!!!!
I love my sweet baboo!!!!

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

forgiveness...but

I thought I was pretty good at forgiving (yeah me) but I found out I am not!!!! The last few years have really put me to the test with forgiving those that hurt me. The last few months have just challenged me even more. Now this last weekend was it for me. I worked at a woman's weekend down it Tucson. ( more on that later) There was one person in particular that really drove me crazy. I found out just how unforgiving I can be. I can say I am sorry to someone pretty easily, however that is usually followed with an "I am sorry too" from the other side. Makes it easier to forgive. It is sooooo much harder to say I am sorry when the other party either doesn't accept it, or they say something like, "yes you should" and act like they are owed the apology ( what happened to me over the weekend.) I got snippy with one of my team mates ( I know hard to believe) she was bossy and rude and never said she was sorry. She acted like she was never wrong. I had to apologize to her (God insisted) and she just said( forgotten and walked away) Let me just say how very hard it was not to want to "explain" why I snapped at her (God didn't say I needed to do that) It seemed all very unfair to me. Let me also say she did this to several people over the weekend. She was very demanding and never wrong. Then I thought of Christ on the cross when He said "forgive them Father, for they know not what they do" WOW! Christ was perfect and never did anything wrong and He forgave. Most never accept what He did for us.I can assume most who saw Him say that and die thought "He can't forgive me, I have done nothing wrong". Most of the world has never said I am sorry to God. Why do I expect more. Christ's followers can be the worst (I was at a weekend with Christen women. My sister says we are all diseased sheep. I think she is right. Satan sure knows where and how to attack. I know people who say that they have forgiven someone ten years ago,and yet when they talk about it you can tell they are still hurt, angry and haven't let go of the grudge. I don't want to be like that!! It is hard not to want to give your side or justify why you were hurt and angry. I don't think that is what God wants most of the time. For me, truly apologizing, or forgiving can't include I am sorry...but. I know my heart and motives and that is not true forgiveness. They next time I need to forgive someone or say I am sorry ( and it will happen, probably with another diseased sheep) I need to stop after the apology and leave the but out. I also can not assume that they will say it back. walk away and let God heal me. No more buts. when I say I am sorry. I can only take care of me and what God is telling me...so hard. Let Him heal my hurts and trust Him. Christ does it all the time!

Monday, March 23, 2009

what happened?

I can not believe how time gets away from me any more. I think I will do something soon ie... dinner, read, write, call, blog and next thing I know it has been, hours, days or weeks. I know they ( who are they anyway :P ) say time goes faster when you get older but I have couple of issues with that. 1. I am not getting that much older/ 2.why does it do that? I want examples. 3. Time is time and I have the same amount now as I always have (you know 34 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 day a year. I think the real problem is I am just busier and I am going in so many direction. I can't seem to decide what to do next, I just want to start all over with nothing and try again some days. Maybe I would keep up better if I could start again...probably not. It is like keeping my house really clean and organized...it never lasts (sorry Grace :D )I try a schedule and I end up loosing it or not following it, kind of like a diet ( a bad word by the way ) I can not promise I will keep up any better than I have been, although I have some great stories to share ( spring break, boy scouts pine wood derby, Nathaniel's point of view, etc.) but I will endeavor to do better. Now I have to go make dinner before time gets away and my family has to diet.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

lazy

I know there are 7 deadly sins...truthfully aren't all sins deadly? That is why we need Christ. Anyway that isn't what I was intending to say. Out of the 7 deadly I can tell you that the one I struggle with ( OK it isn't even a struggle,,,) is slothfulness. Although gluttony runs a screaming second. You would think being a stay at home mom I would accomplish so much. Nope, the more time I have the less I tend to do. I work much better under pressure. You can see how I have neglected my blogging. I love doing this and it is great therapy for me but....lazy!!! I have lots of projects started or running through my mind but most never get completed. This runs in my family, my mom will agree with this about me and herself as well. I need help. Any one that has any great advice or better yet scripture I can pray over and over I would really appreciate. I need to break free from this and I need accountability. I don't need nagging, judging, or complaining....I can do that myself. I know God doesn't like a sloth, hence the deadly sin. I don't like being this way but don't have the will power to stop. It is like going on a diet YUCK that isn't even a fun word. I need Mary Poppins out look for cleaning and any thing else that requires energy and gumption. Thank God He loves many anyway but I know He doesn't want me to stay this way....now off to do more laundry and maybe something else:0

Monday, February 23, 2009

tattoo



I have a tattoo....some of you are no doubt surprised. I was :D Growing up getting a tattoo never entered my mind. So here is the story of how and why things changed and I now have one.
3 years ago (aprox.) I stared really spending time with God in a new way for me. I was seeking Him, reading, praying, fasting, needing to draw close and have a fresh outlook. I didn't even know why I just knew God wanted more of me. I have never had good self esteem. I didn't date (not even prom). More than once I was told I was "nice" but...Looking back I know God protected me from a lot. I really started getting "IT" I am beautiful!!!!! God loves me, He is in love with me, He thinks I am breathtakingly beautiful!!!! I don't think 99% of us really believe that and it is sad. Paul is a wonderful husband, but he isn't perfect, I don't get as many compliments as I would like, I don't always feel like I am pretty to him ( my problem not just his)But it doesn't matter what anyone else may think I am beautiful to the GREAT I AM!!!!! Doesn't that just blow your mind? I have the tattoo as a reminder of what God thinks of me. In the Old Testament, they would put up memorials to remember what God had done. My tattoo is my memorial of what God has taught me. I pray I never forget. How can I with my beautiful reminder! By the way Paul does believe I am beautiful too. You are beautiful too, and if you need a tattoo...go for it :D

Monday, February 2, 2009

aah haa moment

I always joke (and I am not alone in this)"don't pray for patience". It really goes for anything. If I pray for more faith, what is God going to do to increase my faith? Just wave a magic wand? I doubt it, give me situations to give me faith? YES!!Praying for anything, faith, strength, patience, humility, compassion ( I did this and I now live with my mother-in-law :D )is going to get us things to teach us how to have these. Look at the fruits of the Spirit. Try praying for that and see what you get. God usually puts someone or several someones in my life to make me more like Him. He wants us to have unconditional love, He wants us to forgive.Unfortunately that is how we learn, or at least attempt to learn. I was being sooo spiritual yesterday at church and was praying for God to help me be nice to someone that drives me crazy and I got a huge aah ha moment. Not fun but huge... I am that someone that so so prayed for when they needed to be more compassionate...OUCH! I am teaching someone patience, unconditional love, etc. and not by being a godly example but because I rub someone the wrong way? Say it isn't so. How humbling, how painful, how embarrassing, how unfortunately true.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

computers and me

I know the research and sayings about couch potatoes and television but what about computers? I am not that computer savy, even though I have a blog, check e-mail and live on facebook, but I know I spend too much time on it. Lately my passion for God has been fading, and I couldn't figure out why. I know we all go through times like this, but I wanted to know what might have triggered it for me.... I believe now some of the problem is my computer (facebook in particular).Now don't get me wrong, I love facebook, that is the problem. I love staying connected to everyone I love and miss, and there are a lot. I can spend lots of time wading through all the comments, pictures and updates, and next thing you know I have been sitting at my computer for a couple of hours, especially if I blog. I can also find it depressing when I miss everyone so much. I am not spending time in God's Word enough (I rarely spend "enough" time) I am not praying as much. I am whining about everything and everyone I am missing. I am sure God loves my whining. I need to get more disciplined and put God first not facebook. Sometimes I think all this technology isn't a great thing, at least not for me. It is like all the prepackaged junk food...not good for me either. Way to easy to eat unhealthy and get fatter, which I am doing also, but that is another blog. Do me a favor, first please pray for me that I will return to my first love...Jesus, and second if you see me on facebook ask me if I have spent time with God first. I need the accountability! Thanks

Thursday, January 22, 2009

stuck...praying for help

It is a good thing that my New Year's resolution wasn't to keep up with my blog more...I would be sadly failing. Well that is what happens to most resolutions anyway. Nathaniel just found a box of packing peanuts, and is having a grand time with them. My sister and I would make faces on them and have wars with each other. I miss that kind of creativity and I am glad that Nathnaniel is now playing with something so simple that he has to use his imagination.
We as a family all had Monday off so we headed to Wal-Mart...isn't that what everyone does with there day off and family time? Well Paul planned on stopping at the river bed first. Something I was not told or prepared for. I wore flats and long jeans. The river bed has very soft sand and water (equals mud). The boys loved it, and I am so thankful that all three were playing together, trying to skip rocks, get wet, etc. There wasn't a lot of water so you "can" drive down near the edge. Not something encouraged by most unless you have a ATV...we have a minivan. Well we got stuck. I had just used at least two dozen wipes to clean my shoes, feet, jeans, and hands, and now I had to get out and help dig us out. The sand was all the way up to the door on the front of the van. Paul found some boards ( probably from someone else getting stuck there) we dug, and dug, and dug, the kids helped. I told the kids lets stop and pray. Jennifer and Levi were not so sure about this but Nathaniel was all for it. We held hands, Nathaniel and I prayed, the others chose not to. When we finished Nathaniel asked if "Jesus was going to help us dig now?" I said ,"He just might". In less than two minutes Paul was able to back out and get unstuck,(by the way I never complained to Paul about any of this, it was actually kind of fun). I stopped and said "thank you Jesus" mostly so the kids could hear and see that God does care and answer. Nathaniel imediately said "mommy Jesus just said you're welcome!" I loved it!! I bet God does love it when we say thank you, and if we listen I know He says "you're welcome". Oh to be more like a child.

All of this was so much more fun than Wal-Mart or staying home watching T.V. Thank you Jesus for a great Monday with my family!!

Monday, January 12, 2009

birthday boy

Levi is 8. It is hard to believe. He is tall skinny and brilliant! He loves science and solving things. His party is at the end of the week. We are going to be doing experiments, and investigating things. Paul is in charge of that part. Levi is shy and loves his family. He takes good care of his brother and sister. He asks questions that I can't begin to answer and has a faith in God that amazes me. He does complain about school being boring and life not being fair. He always wants whatever toy is being advertised. He is an advertiser's dream. But he quickly moves on to the next new things. He is a lot like Paul but there is also a lot of me and my sisters in him. He is very creative and I don't doubt that what ever he decides to do with his life he will be able to accomplish. He is always coming home with girls phone numbers. I don't let him call them, he is still way too young. I am proud of him and I thank God for such a wonderful son!!

Friday, January 9, 2009




Jennifer's IEP ...So proud!!!

Yesterday we had Jennifer's IEP (individualized educational plan). We have one of these at least once a year and sometimes more. All of her teachers, therapests, Special Ed. director and Paul and I were there. It was long and there was a lot to go over. Reading and understanding some of those reports are really fun. She was tested, observed, talked to and every thing else you can think of. To try and put it in words that make sense isn't easy so bare with me...she is doing great!!!! They are very impressed with her abilities, and wanting to succeed. She is spelling on grade level! Her reading is her strong suit. She is averaging at a 7 yr. old but compared to her testing and others she is over achieving! A lot of children platue at this age and parents do not push to succeed. We try and expect more from Jennifer ( the teachers said) than most parents. She can tell time and her math and writing skills continue to improve. She is very social and the other children are starting to include her (playing tag etc.) . When we go to the store it seems everone knows her and says hi.
We know that God is the reason for all of this and we give Him all the praise. We know that it is a hard road we are on with her but we are sooo blessed. She had great teachers in Florida, both in school and church (THANKS VICKI!!! ) Holly was also alway encouraging. We have been very fortunate and are grateful. Eating is still a concern and she seems to be getting bigger. Her teachers did say that she seems more active and is running more. I am trying to keep her and I motivated (pray for us both). She is at the very highest end of mild retartation. I know God gave her the teachers she needed everywhere she has been and again I want to say thank you. She really is my "sweet cheeks" and a precious princess. I am soooo proud of her!!!!!

by the way as a side note she is very "normal". When asked to draw and talk about her home life, she drew a girl that was usually happy but complained about having to clean her room and too many chores :D
Paul and I just laughed about that.