Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Long night

Yesterday was going along fine. I knew I had a sleep study that I had to be at by 9:30 p.m. I wasn't allowed to have any caffiene all day : ( I also could not use any conditioner, lotion, mouse, powder, etc. I live in Arizona and it is DRY and cold right now. Not using any of those products was a real drag. I wanted lotion so bad and my hair...remember the science experiment where you put your hand on the big silver ball and your hair stands straight out? I didn't need the big shiney ball. Life was just moving along and then Paul's mom got a call to come in to her doctor right away. When she came home she told me she has breast cancer. Now my mother in law comes across  very stoic and removed from showing any tenderness, but I was crushed. I didn't show it, she didn't show it, I don't think she will. This isn't what I expected in the new year, but then I am always getting unexpected stuff, that is life. I do know this is going to be difficult for Paul and his mom both but I think it can be a good thing too. I must admit going to my sleep study was hard. I didn't want to leave Paul and I knew sleep would be difficult. Well I must have slept enough to get the information they needed and I was put on a c-pap half way through the night. I will be getting my own in the near future. Don't think I slept any better the second half but they seemed to think I did. I don't think the c-pap comes in candy apple red with lace so I am not looking forward to sleeping next to my sweet prince in one. I know he will just be glad I am breathing and not snoring, now he can sleep bette also. Life is full of so much and I have a hard time processing it all sometimes. I don't want to just have a hum drum life though and that means embracing the ups and downs. All that is happening makes me appreciate what I do have. Today my oldest son turns 10. We are going to have cheesecake with strawberries and Friday he gets a party with all of his friends. I want to relish each moment and without the difficult stuff I don't think I would appreciate the blessings that I have in abundance. I am going to go celebrate life today!

No comments: