Monday, September 22, 2008

Lot's Wife

I have been remembering Florida a lot lately. I think it must be the time of year. They are no doubt getting reading for Judgement House. I was the Angel of Death (Levi hated that), I switched to a guide, which I really enjoyed doing, then I was asked to be in Heaven when I wasn't guiding....I LOVED IT!!! Mostly the inbetween times. Anyway, God has been showing me a lot about my feelings for Callahan and Gray Gables. Let me preface this with I DO NOT think that Callahan is anything like Sodom and Gomora. However I never had much empathy for Lot and his family, especially his wife ( no name even). I now can say how much I can feel for her is amazing. They probably knew that they needed to move from there but didn't want to. I too can say that I felt God telling me we needed to leave before the Lord dragged us out. Lot and his family had to have the angels grab them by the hand ( every one of them) and drag them out. They took nothing with them. We left soooo much behind, and thinking about it still hurts. The kicker was they were told not to look back. Lot's wife did, and turned to a pillar of salt. Let me say, how many of us would not have looked back? She wasn't told "what" would happen to her and even if she had the temptation would have been great, look at Eve. I know when my kids or even myself are told "don't" that is usually a big challange.

This past week God has been telling me to stop looking back. Callahan was a huge blessing to me and my family, but I am turning into a pillar of salt by living in the past. I miss everything. If Lot's wife hadn't looked back I wonder if she would still have been miserable. They ended up in a cave with nothing. She probably would have whinned about everything she gave up...I know I have. She was never used by God again. I don't want that for me. If Lot and his family would have left willingly I think it would have been much easier on them and they might have been able to take their stuff with them. I am trying to not only listen to God better but to do as He says.

I miss our home, it was beautiful. I miss the schools, they were great, I miss our church, I grew a lot, I miss my stuff, I miss my church family, it was the best! I have to live in my cave for now, and I praise God for not turning me into a pillar of salt. I don't have to forget Callahan(I couldn't)but I can't keep my heart and soul so intwined with it either. God has given me a new place to live and I need to actually start living here and not merely surviving.

Read Genesis 18 and 19 with a new look. Hold things loosely because you never know when they may be taken. Enjoy everything you have and don't take it for granted. Tell people how much they mean to you. Try not to whine! God is Good all the time!!!!!

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